Another Person Drinks with Us – kotak awiyak ī-wihci minihkwīmikowahk

I remember way back in the mid to late 2000s, I used to drink much more that time than I have recently before I quit last month in August. Although I was in my mid-thirties, it was a confusing time for me personally. I am glad to be here to tell you this story.

Picnic table where we sat and drank

My brother and I had managed to purchase a 66 oz Five Star whiskey. I do not remember the details on how we got it but we had it and we were going to have an all-nighter down by the lake at Hall Lake. It was a beautiful summer night and we had a mosquito coil repelling all the bloodsuckers away from us. We had a deck of cards, and we played many card games, I do not remember if we gambled or not, but it was fun.

View from where my brother and I were sitting.

As the night wore on, I remember laughing and joking with my brother as we brought up stories of our friends and the past history of our lives growing up at the house up the hill. I remember we would argue over trivial matters and apologize for past misunderstandings. Dialogue would be spread from “I love you, bro,” to “You’re so stupid!” Haha, good times (well, maybe not).

Seth sat at the corner of the table, by the tree

As the morning came and the sun started rising, I asked my brother what happened to the guy that was sitting with us and was laughing and listening to us as we drank ourselves away.

“You kept asking me earlier, I keep telling you, there was nobody here with us.” My brother explained.

I thought back and distinctly remember a guy wearing a brown leather jacket, a dark jean pants and he had neat black hair. I remember his smile as he nodded his head when he listened to us joking and laughing. I could not recall the way his face looked, but he was dark-skinned like my brother and me.

View by the lake.

Later, as I drank some more over the years at different times, I would recall this event vividly. When I got to a certain state of intoxication, I would sense that I would see the other person again, I even gave him a name: Seth. I would be in a heightened state of awareness of my surroundings and fear would envelop me as I thought that he would show up again.

When I lived at Lakeview apartments, I saw him at the corner of my eye at the doorway, and yes again, I was in a certain state of intoxication. I did not see the details of his features as well as the last time, more of a silhouette of the man I saw so many years ago. This was either 2012 or 2013, I binged many times during those years.

Actual apartment room doorway.

The last time I saw him was in a dream. I had been drinking at my apartment and fell asleep. I was parked at a parking lot of a 24-hour gas station, Meechewin Place. It was night, well past midnight, I was sitting on the driver’s side when I heard a voice saying, “Let’s go see her.” A reference to my now wife of four years. I looked at the passenger seat and there he was, Seth, grinning and encouraging me to drive to Hall Lake even though I was drunk. His features were in much more in detail than the silhouette but less than when I saw him down by the lake.

I had told my mother about the initial interaction with Seth and she called him,”kimacāyisim,” your devil or demon. I do not know how serious she was because she just sounded like she was teasing me about it. Considering I was drunk at the time, I am not surprised at her reaction. Maybe she was trying to scare me, haha, it might have even worked a time or two when I thought about it at night.

I am a skeptic of many things, including my imagined interaction with this person. I was always under the influence when I thought of him or supposedly interacted with him. Never at any time was there any physical contact. Other than in the dream, he never talked or reached out to me. He was more of a presence that kind of reminded me of me, like a younger self who had never gotten anywhere in his life. A path I could have ended up following many times but have since smartened up. It is surreal to write about and even more so to reminisce about the events that I know could not have taken place.

Being under the influence of any mind-altering substance is dangerous: physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.  Spiritually I have many challenges, I hope to understand someday what I may be missing, but then again, maybe I am not missing anything. However, that is another blog for another time.

kotak awiyak ī-wihci minihkwīmikowahk – Another Person drinks with us

kimacāyisim – your devil or demon (may mean something different to others).

I – niminihkwān

you (one) – kiminihkwān

s/he – minihkwīw

we (but not you) – niminihkwānān

Eyes Image by Christian Dorn from Pixabay

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